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We Are Held Back

We Are Held Back

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We are crippled from our deep underlying commitments made from a long lost time when we had very little choice other than to try to protect ourselves from the hurt we were experiencing.

The interesting thing is that as we become adolescents this underlying commitment becomes energy towards destruction and our lives take on this energy in many ways.

This can manifest in our relationships with others, or our relationship with food, alcohol or sugar.

As we reach adults this energy becomes so familiar for us that we do not recognise it, it becomes who we are.

Sometimes we can find ways to unlock pieces of this energy puzzle which helps us to move forward to feel like we have ' fixed' it.

We move into a new relationship, we start a healthy diet, abundance begins to flow, things feel better, for a while.


This underlying commitment is so integrated within us that the chances of recognising it is very remote.
It is not until we find ourselves in another destructive place or situation that our commitment rears its head, again.
We develop a ' frozen heart' towards our true selves and believe in how we behave, react and practice on a daily basis.


Alice a client has worked through her ' I'm not worth it' , underlying commitment and is married to a dynamic man, she is successful and has abundance in all areas of her life. As a little girl, she learned that her brothers were better, cleverer and more successful.

She has created a life that's risen above expectations, she has 'fixed' herself and that's her belief.
Yet unknowingly she does not see her growing minor health problems, she doesn't recognise that her success is detrimental to her children.
She does not see that her relationship with her mother is strained.
She does not recognise that each new success in her career is another way that fills the space created by her underlying commitment.

It's not until life begins to falter, either through health or her marriage that she begins to feel strained that she might see something is not as she believed it to be.

Our underlying commitment can be very fragile particularly as we get older.

We all have underlying commitments and if we are willing to try to reflect on our lives our intellectual feeling heart will inform us and if we a willing to stop, be still and listen, we can choose to undercover the messages behind these underlying commitments we made such a long time ago.

Linda Bretherton

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